Taking it all back

Somewhere between running and building my businesses, taking care of my family and volunteering. I forgot something and I kept pushing it further and further away. What I lost was time for myself. Some days I am at my studio 8/12 hours and when I am not at the studio I am usually at desk editing. I love my job and the brand that I have built. But it's time I take back my me time. I miss my friends and family and I miss myself. So I spent a few months rebranding and reworking numbers to figure out how to work better and have a life as well as make the living that I would like. Yay! It's working and I now have more time for my life. 

So during the last few years of this rushing madness I put on 50 pounds. Holy mother!!! I cried when I did the math because I have been hiding it pretty well from myself and every one else. I do eat pretty healthy however being mostly vegetarian I eat a lot of meat substitutes, and I LOVE cheese pizza, holy carbs batman. They really add up. 

I made up every excuse known to man about why I could not find the time to work out. How it must be nice to have all this time because I sure don't have it. 

Well I made up my mind that I am going to take it all back! Every thing is changing and I am excited about that. I am loving, I mean loving working out. I love how it makes me feel and truthfully I can't get enough of that feeling. I am so excited to see what's ahead. 

Just a dog mom?

So most of you know that Honey and I have been trying to have a human child, for around 8 years now. May has always been a pretty hard month for me; being that is main focus is mother’s day. It seems every commercial is about mother’s day. Every wear you look something mother’s day. It even seams that the animals are busy in May. Birds nest, little baby bunnies in my yard. It can bring a girl down. recently however honey and I decided that it would not be so bad if we just let go and lived our life as dog parents would that be so bad? Turns out its pretty great. However sometimes you just can't help feeling left out, especially when every one in your family has human children. Then I came across one of my favorite bloggers and rescue groups blog on mother’s day. And it completely hit home. It’s a great read! http://luckydogrescueblog.blogspot.com/2012/05/im-mom-too.html

Sunday Video Blog

This week was.....Well, not that great. I was pretty sick for most of it. I don't think that I have ever been this sick=( The good news, is that I feel a little better today.



I lit the last advent candle today...That means its almost time.



Oh so close!!!



I bought honey the best Christmas gift to date!! He will filp out for sure!




We will end with a classic=)

Sunday video blog

I miss honey. You would think that because its so close, it would be easier. But its not.. For me it is harder, because I am so close and I want so bad to touch him, right NOW!



The very first song I ever played for him, and sang I use to be quite the karaoke singer...



My favorite actor in my favorite show, dancing to one of my favorite songs..How could you go wrong...



This is how I want people to feel about my work..


I feel like I could pull my own skin off to feel him close to me...


Just in to it...


We will end with my favorite Christmas song=)

My week set to music

I think that I am going to start to do a Sunday blog... I am going to put up songs that reflect my week=)

We shall see how it goes. Then maybe another day, I will post my week in photos. I miss blogging so, I am going to try to do it more!

Put the tree up, made me sad. I was very happy that my mom came to help.


Found this song it fits


Went back to work taking cheescake photos.


Talking to honey always makes it better!


That was my week=)

Not so sweet!

Med update…. So I started taking the medication metformin, yesterday being the first full day of it..

I took it in the morning, I felt ok, not great but ok. Around 11:00, I ate 2 pieces of candy from the Halloween bowl…MISTAKE! I was sooo so sick. I was sick all night. I did some research, and found out that it does this to a lot of people when the eat something sugary or high in carbs while on this medication.

Looks like I might be skinny in no time… They say that after it levels off that you can return to eating normal, but after yesterday and last night, I will never look at a piece of candy the same way in my life.

I feel pretty good today!

A baby soon, I sure pray so!

About 8 years ago, Honey and I decide that it was time to have a family. We stop taking birth control and tried, and tried. With nothing. With each passing year and what seems to be a hundred doctor visits nothing??
What going on with me, I would ask every time… We don’t know all your test come back normal..
Well something is wrong with me…Each year that past my symptoms got worse and worse. Wight gain being the most irritating one, no matter what I would eat or how hard I exercise nothing.. Hair growing place it should not, high blood pressure….NO BABY>> Something is wrong…Finally I see a doctor with since. She tells me I don’t know what’s wrong but we will find out. I get transferred to a specialist in Newbern, we think you have poly cystic ovary syndrome http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/polycystic-ovary-syndrome/DS00423 but your test are negative.. Don’t worry, we are sending you to the best fertility doctor in NC at ECU…I wanted to cry…

Well today, me and my mom made the hour and a half drive to ECU. My doctor is amazing, he talked to me and listened to me. He did a quick ultrasound… Yeap you defiantly have PCOS and that’s why you have had all these side effects. I am now on three different medications to get things under control. Once my love returns we will start the next step. I can’t even explain how I feel to have some news on what’s wrong, and a place to start. So I am defiantly holding on to the promise that God put in my heart that I will have my miracle in the coming months. Oh an my mom has this feeling that its going to be twin girls??? My poor husband if that becomes true, we have 5 girls dogs, that would be 8 to one…lol

I will try my best to keep every one updated on the progress of meds and what’s going on. I will also be cutting way down on the studio and focusing more attention on the Magazine.

A little insperation=)
John 14:27

“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid."


Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.


Jn 14:27 Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you: not as the world gives, give I to you. Let not
your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.